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I’ve been attending a lot of Going Away Parties recently. Calling them Parties seems a little mean, mostly to me, the One Who Is Left Behind. Saying goodbye to someone that you really love is really quite difficult. Saying goodbye to a whole bunch of people you love… man, it hurts.  
 
  “In the wilderness, God is killing the desires that are killing you.”  
 
  Yesterday’s sermon was on Exodus 17 , the famous passage of the the grumbling Israelites forgetting their rescue from 400 years of generational slavery in Egypt and the Lord’s provision for them in the desert (walking through the Red Sea, manna from heaven, etc etc.) and how they questioned whether He was truly with them or not. It’s easy to sit there, comfortable in the pew of the air conditioned church and think  “Those guys were so dumb. How could they not see how God was taking care of them?”   
 And then I realized. I am in the wilderness. I am an Israelite. I am grumbling. I am worried. I am fearful about tomorrow. Heck, I’m fearful about today. Today, I heard the click of the door as one of my best friends left Athens for a new permanent life in Washington D.C. And she’s the just the first! Over the next few weeks, I’ll hear that proverbial click about 6 more times.   
  “In the wilderness, God is killing the desires that are killing you.”  
 I thought about that quote from the sermon a lot yesterday.  Killing what’s killing me.  I thought about what’s killing me right now– my desire for my life to be what I want. To have friends that will stay in Athens forever with me. To be known well and know others well. To have friends and people to share life together and walk alongside and grow up with. Those are my desires, and losing them is making me miserable. But perhaps the misery is necessary.   
 What does it look like to trust that the wilderness might just be the thing that will save me from myself? From my idols? From this ideal life that I had planned for myself? When everything else is crumbing away into desert dust… all that’s left is the Rock that God says he will provide water from– the Rock of Christ.  
 I’m not sure how long I will be in this wilderness– maybe a while, and I think that’s OK. But until then… I will trust that this is for my good… for removing my expectations of life that are making me feel lonely and not good enough. For allowing me to see something even more beautiful than my little plans.  
 And speaking of plans… please invite me to do things as I will most likely be sitting at home watching Revenge on Netflix by myself. K thanks. 

I’ve been attending a lot of Going Away Parties recently. Calling them Parties seems a little mean, mostly to me, the One Who Is Left Behind. Saying goodbye to someone that you really love is really quite difficult. Saying goodbye to a whole bunch of people you love… man, it hurts. 

“In the wilderness, God is killing the desires that are killing you.”

Yesterday’s sermon was on Exodus 17, the famous passage of the the grumbling Israelites forgetting their rescue from 400 years of generational slavery in Egypt and the Lord’s provision for them in the desert (walking through the Red Sea, manna from heaven, etc etc.) and how they questioned whether He was truly with them or not. It’s easy to sit there, comfortable in the pew of the air conditioned church and think “Those guys were so dumb. How could they not see how God was taking care of them?”

And then I realized. I am in the wilderness. I am an Israelite. I am grumbling. I am worried. I am fearful about tomorrow. Heck, I’m fearful about today. Today, I heard the click of the door as one of my best friends left Athens for a new permanent life in Washington D.C. And she’s the just the first! Over the next few weeks, I’ll hear that proverbial click about 6 more times.  

“In the wilderness, God is killing the desires that are killing you.”

I thought about that quote from the sermon a lot yesterday. Killing what’s killing me. I thought about what’s killing me right now– my desire for my life to be what I want. To have friends that will stay in Athens forever with me. To be known well and know others well. To have friends and people to share life together and walk alongside and grow up with. Those are my desires, and losing them is making me miserable. But perhaps the misery is necessary.  

What does it look like to trust that the wilderness might just be the thing that will save me from myself? From my idols? From this ideal life that I had planned for myself? When everything else is crumbing away into desert dust… all that’s left is the Rock that God says he will provide water from– the Rock of Christ. 

I’m not sure how long I will be in this wilderness– maybe a while, and I think that’s OK. But until then… I will trust that this is for my good… for removing my expectations of life that are making me feel lonely and not good enough. For allowing me to see something even more beautiful than my little plans. 

And speaking of plans… please invite me to do things as I will most likely be sitting at home watching Revenge on Netflix by myself. K thanks.